Monday, January 23, 2006

Happy New year...year of the ...(fill in the blank)

WTF is wrong with people???? why the hell would you think it's ok to come into work on a Monday morning where I’m already in a pissed off mood just because it’s MONDAY..and here comes dumb ass with a know it all smirk on her face, fresh cup of coffee which I made a little too dark because I know how much she hates it dark...looks at me and says "What ever you do don't go see "The New World" in the first place I NEVER listen to critics let alone people who know nothing about film because they can't understand half the shit that’s going on in the first place. Any way..she proceeds to tell me it sucked because of the way Pocahontas kisses John Smith blah blah blah, something else was said there....and I told her "listen I’m still going to go see it because I go to a movie not only for the story line but for the directing and photography and the actors, every aspect of a movie." She stopped and said " Well anyway it sucked go waist your money then.. and by the way BLAH BLHA BLAH ..."she told me the end of the movie .....WTF!!!!!!!! I wanted to get up and take that coffee and give her a Sunshiny Monday morning Coffee enema...this is the second time she does that to me... So I yelled at her and reminded her that Movie and acting etc is my thing and to please refrain from ever talking to me about what she thinks about a movie and never ever discuss the ending of a movie to me EVER!!!! ughhghghghgh Breath breath breath. Let me fill you in on what’s been going on since New Years...

I Started the NEW year sitting with Eddie on Sonnia's couch SICK as a dog. I could hardly get out of bed, it felt like I was dying and a week and a half into it I was actually praying for it. Many days of hot flashes, dizzy spells and hallucinations caused by way to much cold medication finally came to an end the second week of January. I've decided this year I would, of course start exercising more (who hasn't made this promise), complain less, try and be a little less angry at the world, (note to self: cancel my order for the Marv the Martian Lazar Gun) go get a physical, and see a dentist etc. I'm proud to say that I've done two of many things on my list. My visit to the dentist reminded me I am the worse speller in the world (as if I needed reminding) Filling out my patient information form I came to the part that asked Allergies? I am allergic to Penicillin, at the time of my apt I could not for the life of me remember how to spell that, so I decided I'd abbreviate making it easier for me and still be clear for the dentist. It was only after sitting in THE CHAIR waiting to be examined did I realize my mistake. As she pulled my chart from the box hanging in the examining room there it was in HUGE print.... allergies? PENIS. I fought the urge to stand up and slap the record out of her hands, wondering at the same time just how close to china that drill on the tool tray would get me..... "Oh please please please don't let her notice" ..... SILENCE... then "Uh..and what is this here? your allerg...." Penicillin that’s Penicillin" I yelled out before she could finish "Sorry I messed up the abbreviation" she looked at me then back at the chart with a smirk ... "Well then let’s just correct this." Things didn't get any better after that, it turns out I have 14 cavities and it's going to cost me an arm and a leg, but in the spirit of my NEW YEARS resolution, I listened to the receptionist tell me how much it was all going to cost...took a deep breath, smiled and decided I'd take it one tooth at a time. Deep breaths don't always work, this I learned while gripping the edge of my dresser, trying to control my anger, practically hyperventilating over what Summer's step mom had just told me. I'll make a long story short... Summer told me that her step mom had hit her ONCE AGAIN.!! I called her father and we talked about it in a calm manner. Couple minutes go by and my phone rings and its Summer's step mom. FIRST mistake she made was calling me with an attitude "Maritza I was told that you called me and didn't get an answer? let me tell you that’s a HUGE lie I didn't get a phone call from you... and what is this that you’re saying about me hitting Summer?" I said " First of all don't call me giving me attitude, second how many times have I told her father and you NOT to touch Summer in anger ? I'm tired of telling her father that I DO NOT give you permission to discipline her by hitting." she went on blah blah blah bull shit and I asked her " Do you hit your daughter ?" her reply "What I do with my daughter is not your business, your daughter lives under my roof and you know what? I'm more of a mother to Summer than you have ever been" I saw black, my face felt hot and I swear if she was standing in front of me she would not have been standing for long. That’s about the time I threatened to bash her face in and kick her ass!" and I hung up. Later on I explained to Summer what happened and told her she had done the right thing by telling me and if she ever felt threatened or felt like she needed a break from her step mom or dad she could call me anytime and id be there to pick her up. So far all is well I didn't go to jail for assault and I got my point across with only one threat, all in all I think I handled that ok.. ( come on It's me ... it could have gone way worse)

As far as me and my relationship with Eddie....*we might be engaged...He bought me a pair of converse and let’s face it CONVERSE ROCK!!! and to me is the equivalent of an engagement ring. I know what I feel for him and I know it’s getting more and more serious...I'm still not able to say those three words I was SO sure I’d never say let alone feel again but ...I'm getting close. The cute Latin guy that I met on a crazy CZ get together 4 months ago has turned out to be a great addition to my life. No more pity parties, no more I hate all men lets watch them all squirm while I use them and throw them aside...(ok that’s not true I still really hate most men) I'm actually starting to let myself believe that there is a chance at happiness with someone else. That I can be in a relationship and still be ME. I finally let him meet my family and he's still around so He's a keeper.

I've finally gotten off my ass or out of my Colin Farrell Freeze frame and started sending out head shots and resumes. I have an audition on Feb 1st for an independent Spanish film... If any of you have ever heard me speak Spanish you’re probably thinking.. What the hell? But I've never done it and so if I go in there and fail at it at least I can say I tried, and besides auditions are practice for the next one and next one till you land the job..so wish me luck and let’s hope I don't relive the Penis situation in a much more live and embarrassing way....

If January 2006 is any indication to what the rest of my year will be like.. I’ll have to seriously consider Handcuffs, portable seatbelt, anger management, and a small flask in the top drawer of my desk....