Friday, January 31, 2014

New beginnings for 2014

January 31, 2014

After 9 years at MCC, I type on this keyboard one last time. Leaving is bittersweet, I will miss the people and I will miss the feeling you have after 9 years at the same job. It feels like ... I'm going through a divorce, Like I've been in a relationship that was over a long time ago, only i hung on because it was familiar.

In the 9 years I've worked here, I've learned so much.. SO MUCH happened from October 2004 to  January 2014.
These people met me at my emotional, well ALMOST my emotional worse.. I battled my ex, gained control, gained time with my daughter, Found love, Gave birth to a little boy... I've risen and fallen within this group of people..

Many came and went.. but the ones that remain, I've  known through thick and thin,, Sure like EVERYONE does off and on in a relationship, i complained, i threatened giving up, walking away toward a brighter future, but never did i think the day would actually come. The hard part is walking away, believing that you can survive outside of who they know you are.. who you think you still are...

Excitement taps at my brain and pulls at my heart.. I know that come Monday when i drive past the exit to my past and park at the entrance to my new beginning.. I will feel the distance, the uncertain, the fear that maybe I made the wrong choice... BUT i know  that in order to grow you must sometimes give up the known .. jump into the unknown.. I have learned to swim these past 9 years .. Ive learned to fight for what i want and its what assures me that I will not fail. I will grow and I will shine .. The first couple weeks, even months after a break up, the loss is painful and the fears will nag at me while I lie awake in my bed... BUT the fighter in me will scream VALUE yourself... Demand to be valued and Demand a brighter future. No longer will I sit and feel over looked or given up on.. no longer will i feel the guilt on giving less than 100%. NO matter the reason.. reality is I gave up on this relationship but I was not the only one. Here is to new beginning.. tough as they may be..
"Moving forward is rarely accomplished without considerable grief and sadness. And while our sorrow may be profound, the clouds will clear, and the sun will shine on us again. And in that warm, bright light we will find ourselves facing a glorious future. A future of exciting challenges and infinite possibilities, in which the horizon will stretch out before us, trimmed in the heavenly glow of the sunrise of our tomorrow." - Last day at MCC ... Taking 9 years of MEMORIES with me .. Bittersweet

Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Monkey Noggin Check 08/21/2012

So i went to Cranial Technologies yesterday with the Baby and Eddie I found them while googling like a mad women about Torticollis and Cranial shape issues.. No one else has ever noticed so just in case you have not either Syler has always favored his right side.. he will always tilt his head to right and when he is sitting or laying down he will lay his right side against the carrier or crib or whatever.. MONTHS of this cause a flat side on the right side of his head. SEVERE! Eddy never noticed and neither did any one else.. Seeing pics at Dr's office regarding misshapen head etc.. I saw the pics and although to me Syler's seamed bad it did not look as bad as the pics i saw. So i never brought it up to the Dr and i stressed out about it at on my own.. I bought the Pillow from target and started to see a HUGE difference in the shape of his Noggin and his facial features started to even out. Looking down over his head while in my lap i can still see that his ears are NOT at all even.. and his head is still a little off.. etc.. I found this place on line who are reputable and had lots of great reviews and they offered a free exam so i said why not. I went in thinking that his head had improved already so he may not need the band .. prob just therapy for his neck muscle.. When we arrived at Cranial Technologies they had us strip monkey to his diapers and sit him in the middle of a 3d camera circle. they placed a type of gauze or nylon material over his entire head.. (he looked like he was about to rob the cookie factory) I started laughing uncontrollably after that.. from my nerves and because he kept trying to eat it his eyes were drooped down and he was smiling..any hoot... they took pics of his head and the asked that we go back to the room..when the therapist finally came in.. she asked questions and i asked my own..we then looked at the pics and she showed us how misshapen his head still is.. she mentioned the ear alignment and some other things i have already noticed.. I had already done LOTS AND LOTS of research so the things she was saying came as no surprise.. until she said he will need to be fitted with a Cranial Band (helmet type thing) if we do it now he will wear it for 3 months.. the longer we wait the longer he will have to keep it on... Medicaid requires that we go through a specialist who then has to refer us to cranial tech and then we can get the band.. therapy has to go through Dr Giraldi (his dr) The Band cost 3800.00 I already knew this . but i also mentioned that i read that if i have medicaid even if they don't pay we qualify for a cheaper cost.. she said yes it will be 2500.00 still a lot but doable.. If it were up to me i would have started the molding for the band yesterday.. and started the therapy.. but i need to relax and talk to his Dr and see what he thinks... I asked the therapist if with continuous use of the head pillow hes been using ( which has greatly helped his noggin) and repositioning, if his head is capable of correcting itself .. or of its gotten to the point where repositioning and pillow have done what they can and now its time to do more.. she said he def needs the therapy to help his neck muscle relax and keep him from favoring his right side (something that may have happened while in utero ) and the band will help correct his head where it is at now... I called Dr Spider-man (Girladi) and left a message asking that he call me so we can discuss the info i got yesterday and the pics he will be receiving in three to four days from them. I want to see if he thinks Syler can be helped with just the therapy and the repositioning at home. The Rock and Play which he has slept in since birth is a major contributor the the flat head.. the torticollis also added to the problem. She said that they should have a warning on box regarding flat head.. when using that sleeper.. AGAIN the guilt hit because i Knew in my gut we needed to move Syler to his crib at 2 months but after discussing it we decided to wait because we were worried about SIDS.. She kept asking why i didn't discuss with Dr when i noticed a problem and again i felt guilty because i really should have.. BUT I NOTICED and Im taking action and have been for months now... so that is what is important that my little monkey gets the help he needs now... So i am waiting for doc to call me back and then decide what our next action is... just wanted to fill you in.... and i will keep you updated This is a pic of what his head looked like before i started using pillow .. it's still like this but less severe. Brachycephaly with Plagiocephaly This is the special Band he will be using if Dr agrees with Diagnosis from therapist. What is the DOC Band®? The DOC Band, a 6-ounce device, consists of an outer plastic shell with a foam lining. Each DOC Band is different and made specifically for each child by the experienced Cranial Technologies manufacturing team in Tempe, Ariz. We only use high-quality materials to ensure that it does not cause irritation. The light weight of the DOC Band is important because it doesn’t interfere with a child’s balance or daily activities.

Friday, June 01, 2012

""This bud of love, by summer's ripening breath, May prove a beauteous flower when next we meet." from Romeo & Juliet"

July 2012 ~ CREATION
August 29 2011
September 2011
October 2011 The Reveal
November 2011
December 2011
January 2012
Feb 2012
March 2012
April 2012